What codes are you speaking in your marriage?

Pink&Blue

Love & Respect Ch. 2

Sorry I’m a week late on this chapter. Having a busy week will do that for ya! Just want to start of by asking you how the challenge from Chapter 1 went? Wives were you able to show respect to your husbands? Husbands were you about to show love to your wives? Did you notice your spouse doing these things for you? The love and respect concept will continue to be the on-going challenge for the remainder of this book.

I hope everyone got a chance to read over chapter 2. What did you think? Did you learn something new from this chapter? I did!! Chapter 2 ‘To Communicate, Decipher the Code’ has some very basic yet compelling examples of how a husband and wife should interact towards one another. Eggerichs’ also points out ways in which couples do not do a good job at interacting appropriately.

Being married is amazing but in saying that it doesn’t go without those moments of disconnect when we don’t understand why our spouse feels a certain way. Because this is something that will definitely happen we must learn how to decipher our spouses “code”. On page 31, Eggerichs’ points out that sometimes the issue isn’t really the issue. How many times does that happen in your marriage? I know it happens in ours. Sometimes what seems to be the issue of the disagreement isn’t really what you are concerned with. This point is tied back to the story he told of the husband who got a birthday card unknowingly for his wife for their anniversary. For once he remember their anniversary without being reminded and he was so excited that he remember and that he even remembered to get her a card! When she opened it up she noticed it was a birthday card and it was their anniversary…. The wife was hurt that he didn’t even care about her enough to take the time to read the card before giving it to her….As a women I can see how she would feel that way. But the husband was actually caring for her and got her a card for once and actually remembered their anniversary. He was not being unloving towards her on purpose like she was feeling and she was not being disrespectful on purpose when she became angry. That is just how it came off to the other spouse. This iswhere it is important to be careful as to how your words and actions come off to your spouse.

Eggerichs likes to refer to women as pink and men as blue. Women look through a pair of pink sunglasses while men look though a pair of blue sunglasses. We both look at the same thing but how we see it is different. We have to know that there will be times when we do not see things as the other spouse does.

This week I want to challenge you to be aware of these things when you and your spouse do not see eye to eye. Just take a second in that moment and ask yourself…How is my spouse viewing this situation? And if you don’t know, then seek to understand.

>>>What part of this chapter was your favorite? Comment below.

Recent Photography Session

Just wanted to share a quick preview of a few favorites from a family photoshoot I did a few weeks ago of sweet friends of ours. How adorable are they! I’m so thankful they allowed me to do their family session. Photography is a passion of mine and I love capturing sweet moments that will last a lifetime. I am always looking for smiling faces to photograph!

I can do:

Family

Baby/Maternity

Engagement

Senior

If you are interested in my work and would like me to create memories that will last a lifetime then click on the CONTACT button at the top of the page and shoot me a message! 


Sweet couple and the most precious baby!

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FamilySessionPrints-6

FamilySession-37

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FamilySession-18

FamilySession-12

Homemade Laundry Detergent

homemade laundry detergent

I was so excited to make/try this homemade laundry detergent! We normally always use Tide liquid detergent that runs us about $20 a bottle lasting around 90 loads. With it just being just my husband and I, we do about 4 loads of laundry a week. With doing 4 loads a week and using the recommended amount of soap that would mean we would use 2 bottles a year or $40 a year. We have almost been married a year now and we just finished our 3rd bottle of Tide. Sometimes we do more laundry a week or use a bit more. So the past year that has costed us $60. This homemade laundry detergent costed us $29.80 for all the ingredient needed at Kroger. For that price it will make enough detergent for 312 loads of laundry and will last us close to a year and a half! Wow!! What a huge savings! For a year and a half of Tide that will run us $120 and for a year and half worth of homemade laundry detergent it will only cost us $29.80!! That is 1/4 of the price of Tide!

Before I decided to make this laundry detergent I was a little worried whether or not it was HE washer safe. If you do not know what HE means I will explain it for you. HE simple means High Efficiency. In order for a washer to be an HE washer it must use 50-70% less water, electricity, and detergent than a regular washer. Which cuts down on the cost on your electricity and water bills. Because an HE washer uses less water it needs less soap as well. HE detergent produces less suds than regular detergent. If you use a NON-HE detergent in an HE washer it will negatively affect your washer. It can create more moisture leading to mold in the washer and create a smell that is not pleasant. With that being my biggest concern I made sure it was HE safe! And it is!! Also, another concern was will it all dissolve in the washer….And after using it several times I can say YES it all dissolves!

     Below is the receipt with all the ingredients needed to make this detergent. You can see how cheap it really is! It may be a lot to buy at one time but in the long run it will save you a lot of money! If your weekly budget will not allow you to get all the ingredients at one time, I recommend getting one or two every time you go to the grocery. That might make it a little easier on your wallet.

Laundry Receipt

Now to the ingredients:

 1 box or Borax (4lb 12oz)

1 box of Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda (3lb 7 oz)

2 boxes of Arm & Hammer Baking Soda (4 lb total) ***You may be able to find a big box containing 4 pounds in it but at Kroger they only had 2 pound boxes of it so I got 2.

1 Container of Oxyclean (3lb) ***I bought the Kroger brand of Oxyclean as you can see in the picture above. It was much cheaper and is the exact same thing.

2 bars of Fels-Naptha laundry bar/stain remover

3 bottles of Purex Crystals Fabric Softener (55 oz) ***You may be able to find larger bottle of this but at Kroger they only had the smaller ones which is why I had to buy 3 bottles.

>>All ingredient can be found in the detergent aisle except for the Baking Soda. That can be found in the baking aisle<<


Now to making it!

     First things first. I opened my bars of soap up the day before I decided to make it and let them sit out to dry it out a little bit before I used it.

     The hardest part about making this is grading the soap. There are several options in which you can do this. The first thing I tried was to use a cheese grader but that took way too long. If you have a larger grader that may work better for you. Then I tried the food processor. I cut the cheese very carefully into 5 small blocks and then cut each block into little pieces. Then I places about 1/5 of the bar of soap in the processor and ran it until the soap was as small as I could get it. Doing it this way makes mini balls of soap. Using a grader will get your soap a lot finer, but that option didn’t work out for me. Another way you can do this would be to cut the soap into 5 slices and place on a plate and put it in the microwaves for about 1 minute. It will get really big (but don’t worry). You will then let it cool off and it will just crumble into pieces. If I had to do it over again I would start out trying the microwave method! ***If you decide to make this let me know which method you chose and how it worked for you!

     After the soap is graded/crumbled the next part is easy! All you have to do it mix it all together. I used a large bucket we had at home and mixed it in sections. I poured a little bit of everything in then mixed it up and repeated that process until I used all of the products. Did this 4-5 times.

Here it is all mixed up in the bucket

Homemade Laundry Detergent-2

     After emptying the Purex Crystals I kept the bottles and tore of the labels and fill up each bottle with the detergent. This makes it easy to use while doing laundry. The neat thing is the caps on the bottles are measuring cups. I got out a sharper and on the outside of the cap I marked the line that was at 2 tablespoons. YUP, that’s all you need is 2 tablespoons per load!! The rest of the detergent I left in the bucket for now with saran wrap on top. I will eventually buy a sealed container to put it all it.

.:The finished products in the Purex bottles:.

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If you decide to make this let me know how it works for you!

The Simple Secret to a Better Marriage

Love & Respect ch. 1

One of my favorite things about this book is that it is filled with various stories of real life couples struggles and how they were/should be resolved. Chapter one is merely an introduction to what the whole book is about. As you might have guessed the book is about Love and Respect….But how does that actually look like in real life? Dr. Eggerichs pulls this idea straight from scripture in Ephesians 5:33 “Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” (NIV) < L&R>>

So is this idea really as simple as it is written? Kind of! It is a simple command, but because we are human and live in a fallen world…we are not perfect, therefore this basic command(not suggestion) becomes much harder than it sounds. Why do you think the Lord commanded husbands and wives to do just this? When you think about it ladies, which do you want more? Love or respect? Of course we want both but speaking as a woman, I want to be loved and to know I am loved. The same goes for husbands, they want both but more than being loved, they want to feel respected. As a women, it is in our very nature to be loving and nurturing. Therefore our husbands know we love them but when we do not show them respect, they breakdown.

Dr. Eggerich speaks of coming to an “aha” moment with this subject. He states, “Without love, she reacts without respect. Without respect, he reacts without love.” This “simple” command from the Bible has powerful consequences when we do not follow them. This week I challenge you to focus on how you can show respect to your husband and for you men, how you can show love to your wife. I also encourage you to read chapter one in Love & Respect. There are several stories Eggerichs uses to demonstrate this concept. On page 5 in L&R you can find a diagram like this one that illustrates The Crazy Cycle.

crazy cycle

Image from << http://staymarriedblog.com/show-some-respect/ >>

**One thing to remember is that we are called to show our husbands respect even when our husbands are being unloving and husbands, you are to show your wife love even when she is being disrespectful.**

Let me know how this challenge in showing Love and Respect

this week goes for you! Also if I can be encouragement for you let me know!

Love & Respect <>

Learning to Love & Respect

Love and Respect

Are you interested in a marriage book that is truly helpful? I would love to recommend a book to you! Over the next several weeks I will be doing a review/summary of the book called Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. Focusing in on one chapter each week. I do this in effort to help you as you go through the book with me. If you do not have a copy of your own you can order it HERE.

            Love & Respect’s main focus is centered around Ephesians 5:33, which says: “However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” ESV Scripture could not have said it any better than that! A women so desires to be loved by her husband and a man truly desires respect from his wife. When we show our spouse their desired need they will in turn be quick to show us our desired need. I pray that my readers, however many that may be, will begin this journey with me in learning how God intended us to act towards our spouse. Also my best friend will be doing guest post on this topic on my blog! Looking forward to seeing Mindy’s take on some of the chapters! Get ready because we have a lot of reading to do!!